What sticks on a sticky fly paper?

My time in Kenya is running out. For weeks now I’ve not aloud myself to think about it, afraid that I wont be able to enjoy the last weeks... but, truth is, only a few days left at work. Hard to leave something that you feel you’ve just started, or leave stuff you dont know if anybody else will finish. Leave projects I believe in and long to continue doing. Leave the life I’ve been living here.

How are we humans suppose to handle being able to fly half way across the world, live in a totally different country, and culture, and then suddenly fly back and keep on going. Ain’t gonna happen... we change. Experiences affect us. We mold.. leave something here, something else there. Gather something over there, pick up something else right here. Its like these new images, new feelings, new faces are stuck on me. I feel like a sticky paper that is suppose to kill flies, everything is just sticking lately. Maybe cause I know its gonna end. Like I wanna hold on to it, cause I dont know if I’ll ever experience it again.

But, its like this with all things in life. The days and hours pass... and some sticks, some doesn’t, and we forget.. we can’t possibly remember everything.

But, right now, I want to remember it all. Be able to feel everything I’ve been feeling here. All at once.

But, I wont, I have to be satisfied with experiencing in the moment. No matter how much I remember, how many pictures I take, how many wooden elephants I bring home, I have to let it go and move on. Some faces I will remember, some conversations, some incidents. I wish I could carry them all. Luckily our braincapacity is somewhat big enough to remember, to choose what we want to bring with us in the days to come. Luckily, we are not rocks, but formable, changeable, and I know that what I’ve experienced here has changed me, and somehow then, I don’t need to struggle to remember, or force to fit it in my suitcase back home. The changes are here to stay and will always remind me of what I’ve seen, what I’ve felt, what I’ve been able to be a part of, music I’ve heard, dancemoves I’ve seen, foods I’ve tasted, work I’ve done, and Places and People I’ve come to Love...